oh i wish you could meet my boyfriend, my boyfriend who lives in pennsylvania

When he's asleep in Pennsylvania and I'm awake in New York, I just want to call him, wake him up, and (selfishly) say, "It's time to start your day, babe. Spend it all day talking to and missing me," as though he doesn't already spend a huge amount of time doing that.

I wish I was able to get more homework done when he's sleeping than when he's talking to me, but the productivity level is sadly about the same.

I see him for the last time until I come back from winter break at home this weekend, and I am so scared of being away from him for almost 6 weeks.

i'm not so good at being a city girl.

Coming back to the city from somewhere else has always been kind of weird. It feels like I've left my life and am just now returning to it, which used to be a cool thing and now it feels different. It used to be that I would feel this huge sigh of relief gusting out of me in my first step back onto the city street. When the place I'm leaving is one that contains the boyfriend, the feelings are a lot more mixed, often quite sad from missing him and his sweet wonderful puppyself already.

Coming back from other places is more interesting. I had a really nice, relaxing time in Long Island with extended family. Coming back into the city with my suitcase full of Thanksgiving food, pumpkin cookies, and 9 bottles of pumpkin beer was... I'm not sure. It felt okay, which in itself was weird, given how I would like to flee screaming from New York in general and my dorm in particular and take up residence somewhere else, somewhere near, next door if possible, to Jon, somewhere less insane.

But I felt okay coming back yesterday, so I'm hoping this will be a good week, the last one of sanity. This week nothing big is due at school, but the following week there is a quiz and presentation; the week after that, a final for one class and a term paper for the other, followed by another final two days later. I am also supposed to move into my apartment during this week, because... the following Monday is my last final and the next day, I zip right out to California for Christmas and New Year's and ACE Camp(!) and all kinds of other nonsense, where my brain and I will be sleeping until mid-January, missing my man and, possibly, my life, quite a bit.

I will probably also be trying to learn to drive and get my license for those three weeks, so I suppose that could be construed as productive time spent.

Happy Thanksgiving blogosphere

I have one more class, my autism seminar, then it's off to lunch with def a friend from here and maaaaaybe a friend from home. There will be pumpkin beer at this lunch because I mandate it. And then... Long Island for Thanksgiving. Should be fun :)

typical.

To-Do for Today:

Draft a 6 page term paper to be turned in tomorrow morning.

Sit through Social Psychology lecture, Divorce in America lecture, Perception recitation.

Go to work in Brooklyn.

Print out papers and fill out ones that require it.

Locate some office to turn the papers into.

Laundry.

To-Do for Tomorrow:

Turn in 6 page draft.

Go to silly Social Psychology recitation.

Turn in time sheet.

Turn in forms to office.

Laundry if didn't do Thursday.

Homework for Autism Spectrum Disorders and reading for Social Psych.

Bus to Pennsylvania at 5:30!

To-Do for the Weekend:

Be with the boyfriend!

Sleep!

Smile!

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

get out of the bathroom get out of the bathroom get out of the bathroom i woke up 14 minutes ago needing to pee like crazy and ahhhhhhh get out get out get out

i can't resume studying until i urinate... or until this house cools down. jesus christ it is like 80 degrees in this apartment at 5:30 in the morning.

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck midterm tomorrow.

the start to a ... well, a week.

An ear infection. Perception midterm on Wednesday that, if I do better on it than the first, will count for half my grade. Term paper draft due (technically Tuesday but it's fine if I turn it in Thursday). These things all hurt pretty bad. My reward? Sugarfree Red Bull and getting to see my boyfriend Friday night in Pennsylvania.

Also I think I bagged me a roommate (one of my best friendsies Oscar!) for the big-girl apartment. Which will be like Oscar's 3rd apartment and his current one-bedroom is gorgeous so I have no doubts that we will have funnnnn!

tired on a friday afternoon.

hm i don't know how to change my little headline... i turned 20 in august.

school is a lot. work is a lot. missing my boyfriend is a lot. feeling fat is a lot. but it is going to be alright.

the boyfriend has become, in addition to being the boyfriend, the best friend. i've been in love but it hasn't been this good before ever. we are both very very happy with each other. i just wish pennsylvania was closer.

i am going to be getting my very first big-girl apartment soon and living all alone for the first time in december/january. i have very little gym motivation lately, which saddens me, but the big-girl apartment will be a lot closer to the school gym so i will probably feel more likely to go then, especially after i resume daily treadmilling at home over winter break.

sometimes i wish sleeping was like hitting pause on your life. say i wanted to go to bed at 11 (hell, i want to go to bed now). so i would get in bed, fall asleep, sleep til i don't want to anymore, climb out of bed, and it would be 11:01. how great would that be?! i would get so much work done and never be tired.

i'm the luckiest girl in the whole world and if i just keep working my ass off, everything will work out.