sometimes i wish i was like mariella

I wish my Friday was a laid-back kind of day. I have both my jobs and there is quite a bit of rushing like insanity between them. Fuck the Brooklyn commute.

Jake, formerly the cowboy, and I are having coffee on Sunday, primarily to discuss that we are both assholes, I think. If you're reading this, I dropped the pseudonym (expletive expletive expletive). He thinks I am being cold towards him. I think, first of all, that I don't even know how to be cold, and also that typically I am a very affectionate friend and I didn't want him to mistake my platonic affection for continued I-want-to-fuck-you stuff that no longer exists. Anyway I am hoping that that will be a good conversation, since he and I talk like every day and so he is, kind of suddenly, a decently sized part of my social/school life that I would hate to lose due to misunderstanding. If he wasn't there, I would feel really alone in Pat C. Hoy's class. Pat C. Hoy is the teacher... he can't be my only friend in there, too.

Last night my friend Derek, whom I have known for 5 years or something insane like that, was home from school -- he lives on the Upper East Side -- and so we had a late dinner with delicious sangria at Curly's and then went to Urban Outfitters while Jake and I were text-message arguing and I cried while he was in the dressing room trying on overpriced hipster gear and then we came home and watched Saved! and had one drink each. He critically assessed my physical being and told me he thought I would "do better with women." Apparently I am not alone in thinking that I am extremely unattractive to men. Derek and Jake should meet. And then the two of them should meet awkward sign language guy and the animal handler. That would be interesting. I almost think that Derek and Jake would be very successful in convincing the other two that I am an unattractive, frigid cow, given as I have not slept with any of the four of them, much to the latter two's dismay.

Tonight my sign language class and I are going to get drunk at Blockheads and sign to each other and pretend to be deaf and I am pretty goddamned excited about it. I am coming straight from work so I am bringing a water bottle of the vino to work with me (relax... it is staying in my purse and only coming out for the hour long train ride from Brooklyn to midtown). And this is day 3 of no daytime drinking, going strong. I am reasserting my love of coffee until it gets dark.

Lately things have been going well. I kind of miss the simple days of elementary school when I never spoke to anyone except maybe my parents and the occasional teacher. Oh, and the librarian.

Listen to Kate Nash's song, "Mariella."

New favourite FML of all time:

Today, I dropped my keys. Not wanting to lean over and pick them up, I pointed at them and said, "Accio." Then I realized I had tried to use a Harry Potter spell in real life and in public. FML.

I wish I was that person.